Help?

Labor & Delivery, for first time momes

Help?

Postby Crabgrass19 » Wed Nov 11, 2020 10:11 pm

I just had my son not even 3 weeks ago and am really feeling the weight of everything. I dont want to talk to anyone because I dont want to sound like I'm complaining at all. My doctors were concerned during my pregnancy about me having postpartum depression because I already have severe depression and was having very bad days during the pregnancy. I already started taking my medication again but it doesn't seem to be working. I feel numb emotionally and so close to tears all the time. I've also started having massive migraines to the point where I get dizzy. I've also started taking my frustration out on my husband which I never did. Also, I have zero feeling towards my son, I know he's mine but I dont feel any love at all. Its gotten to the point where I either stay up for 24+ hours or want to sleep 12+ hours. Theres no in between.Im not sure who to talk to and it just seems to be getting worse day by day. With everything going on with covid its hard to get an in-person doctors appointment. Any advice on how to combat this?
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Re: Help?

Postby Allie88 » Sun Nov 15, 2020 6:25 pm

Crabgrass19 wrote:I just had my son not even 3 weeks ago and am really feeling the weight of everything. I dont want to talk to anyone because I dont want to sound like I'm complaining at all. My doctors were concerned during my pregnancy about me having postpartum depression because I already have severe depression and was having very bad days during the pregnancy. I already started taking my medication again but it doesn't seem to be working. I feel numb emotionally and so close to tears all the time. I've also started having massive migraines to the point where I get dizzy. I've also started taking my frustration out on my husband which I never did. Also, I have zero feeling towards my son, I know he's mine but I dont feel any love at all. Its gotten to the point where I either stay up for 24+ hours or want to sleep 12+ hours. Theres no in between.Im not sure who to talk to and it just seems to be getting worse day by day. With everything going on with covid its hard to get an in-person doctors appointment. Any advice on how to combat this?


So sorry you're going through this. Depression is hard and its even harder with so many changes. For starters, i think you need to be nice to yourself, try watching cristin neff - i keep preaching on about her recently but shes really good on the whole self compassion topic.
Next you want to try to set a routine where every single day you will do something just for yourself and have your husband take over and not bother you at all during that time. Be it 20 minutes or a full hour. It can be yoga, bubble bath, relaxation, taking a walk by yourself, read a book or a magazine, watching something completely on your own or even lay down to meditate for a while. Make that a routine where its your time.
Try to not sleep for more than 8 hours - it makes things worse. Living with depression is even tougher when you oversleep or don't get any sleep - lack of sleep really screws up your brain on top of existing issues.

Talk to your husband, tell him what you age going through and make a plan of what he can do for you on your bad days and your worst days. Ifs its just giving you space and taking over all parental duties - so be it, but know it can't be that way every single day.

Take time, don't force yourself to bond when you are struggling already, take your time, starting at least with basic logic that its a tiny human you need to protect and slowly go from there. I'm not qualified to speak for this area but i think your brain panicked with so many changes and you've shut your feelings off, and thats ok, take your time - its okay not to be okay, but you need to speak about it to both your husband and doctor.

Don't give up, just slowly add things to the new routine, and subtract others and eventually you will come back to "you". Take it one day, one week at a time. Start off with doing stuff for you and definitely things that can aid relaxation and de stress you.
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Re: Help?

Postby Innocentia » Fri Nov 27, 2020 8:17 am

M so sorry mylove i hope u get well soon i suggest u talk to someone u trust or get counselling this could get from bed to worse u will end up hurting your child or yourself
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Re: Help?

Postby C M D » Fri Feb 05, 2021 4:49 am

I know this is posted a couple of months ago but I just wanted to say that you are not alone having those feelings. Lots and lots of people have felt exactly like you do and it's completely normal. That being said I highly recommend that you contact a mental health professional. because of covid it is hard to get into places but there are so many online options these days. There are virtual doctor's appointments, appointments over the phone, you can sign up for something like better health program or something like that where a counselor can talk to you online or over the phone or via text. I have suffered from depression anxiety almost all my life and sometimes it gets the point where it's too hard to manage on your own. Sometimes even if we are on medication it might not be enough or it might need to be changed to a different type to work again. There is definitely no need to suffer if there is something that can be done about it so just know that there are so many support groups and professionals out there that want to help you and your family. I hope everything is okay right now with you being a few months later, but if not I hope that you were able to find some relief.
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