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Confuse about the relationship with partner....

PostPosted: Sun May 09, 2021 4:14 am
by Dhrumi8798
Hey guys
I am 23 and my partner is 30. We have a long age gape but it doesn’t matter to us.
We are together since 3 years. And we were happy.
But since last few days we are having a cold war. Like we had a fight and i told hime that we will ho on a date on new cafe (opens in our are) than he told me that i am with him only for bcz i want to go in cafes and restaurants and hotels.

By the way i am an independent girl.

I don’t know why he said this to me. Whenever we go anywhere he pays. If i pay for bills he deny to take and don’t allow me to pay.
But in last fight he told me this .
I am very upset and hurt 😔
I don’t know what to do ?
I says sorry and apologies me many times but now I don’t feel attached to him.
I feel like i became feeling less person.
Nothing can change my feelings.

I told him that i feels like this.
But nothing happens like he told me that i am changed and he is still that person whom i love 3 years back.

I don’t know
What to do
I want to be with him in future
I want my old relation back to with him
But I can’t feel that way
I can’t get feelings back which i had in past with him.

Please guyss help me
I really want to be with him
How can i get my feelings back for him??

Re: Confuse about the relationship with partner....

PostPosted: Sun May 09, 2021 6:54 am
by Germane95
Hi personally for me it’s a red flag. I understand that he doesn’t have to do all the spending but if he doesn’t accept your money. And then gives u shit for it. Then that’s quite toxic. In my relationship too my bf spends most of the time. But I’ve made a conscious effort from the beginning to keep it 50/50. He is 10 years older than me and more financially established however suppose he takes me out I always take him out the next time. Whenever I suggest going out the next time. I tell him I want to take u out for dinner/lunch the next time he always says no but I insist. So it’s always even out. Anyways but if he pays and gives u shit for it. It’s disgusting behavior. But it wouldn’t hurt to offer to take him out as a way of reciprocating his actions. Anyways it’s 2021 and I think guys deserved to be taken out pampered as much a woman. So think about it ❤️

Re: Confuse about the relationship with partner....

PostPosted: Sun May 09, 2021 10:51 am
by Kamalama
What started the argument? Everyone says hurtful things at some point out of anger that we don't mean..ask him why he said it in the first place? To be saying that after 3 years together is a bit strange, especially if he insists on paying. But like I said in the heat of an argument we are all guilty of saying silly things. In my opinion this isn't something thats worth throwing away an otherwise good relationship over. Just talk to him makesure he knows he has made you feel like crap and if it happens again then yes I'd say just move on.

Re: Confuse about the relationship with partner....

PostPosted: Sun May 09, 2021 11:16 am
by Namaga
Kamalama wrote:What started the argument? Everyone says hurtful things at some point out of anger that we don't mean..ask him why he said it in the first place? To be saying that after 3 years together is a bit strange, especially if he insists on paying. But like I said in the heat of an argument we are all guilty of saying silly things. In my opinion this isn't something thats worth throwing away an otherwise good relationship over. Just talk to him makesure he knows he has made you feel like crap and if it happens again then yes I'd say just move on.

On point